I remember watching my Grandmother Mary (whom I’m named after) worry, worry, worry, vowing I would NOT grow up to be like that. And yet here I sit. Worried.
I wrote a terribly (beautifully???) painful post yesterday about sexual abuse over at Deeper Church. Got lots and lots of comments from folks who needed me to tell my story so they could share theirs. I’m humbled and deeply grateful.
And yet I worry.
I worry that I won’t matter on this earth, that significance will be elusive to me. I worry that I’ll not make a go at this writing gig, that I will have poured decades into it, not recognizing the fruit that has come. That I will let discouragement overcome me. That I won’t have the relational impact I long for.
This happens when I’m living inside my head, battling those voices of unworthiness. It’s then that I turn to my good friends, my kids and my husband, who remind me of truth. No need to worry. God loves me. Just as I am, imperfect, messy me. That I don’t have to have accolades or fame or book numbers or money to warrant the affection of the Almighty.
All I need is Jesus and people.
All I’m called to do is love Jesus and love people (which includes learning the art of loving myself). Click to tweet this.
So the voices may holler, and the worry may escalate, but I choose now in this moment to silence both.
I am loved. Right now. Right in this vulnerable place. So are you.
The quote above helps so much. “All our fret and worry is caused by calculating without God.” (I am going to HUG Oswald Chambers in heaven!) It’s not up to me to make it all happen. It’s not up to me to force feed my worth.
And it’s the same with you. Are you troubled? Worried? Fretting? Invite Jesus into the stress. Whether you struggle with worth or work or relationships, Jesus sees all that. He is best able to help us when we’re weak and reach for His strength. I wish His strength for you, for me, for us.