I’ve been thinking about Christian maturity (and traits of immaturity) lately, so I came up with this unscientific list of traits of growing Christians. These folks (hopefully they’re us!) are safe, developmental, compassionate, and connected to their savior. Looking at this list, the opposite of it would indicate a lack of growth or maturity. Do you have any to add?

Growing Christians:

1. Ask questions before jumping to conclusions.
2. Are more interested in praising God’s reputation than proving their own.
3. Seek to find the beauty in another, even if they disagree with the person.
4. Ask for forgiveness after being convicted by the Holy Spirit (don’t have to wait to be confronted).
5. Refrain from demonizing others into an us-them paradigm.
6. Are honest about their frailty and problems.
7. Have worked through past pain, trauma, or sins with others in community.
8. Take responsibility for themselves, don’t blame others for their own mistakes.
9. Don’t need to be the person on top.
10. Seek to praise others rather than seeking praise.
11. Don’t care whether they get recognition for their good work.
12. Have an eternal perspective about trials.
13. Are patient.
14. Have a continual conversation with God (prayer).
15. Are kind, not because it’s cool to be kind, but because they genuinely want to help others.
16. Accept criticism with humility, willing to examine how they’ve hurt someone.
17. Deeply desire to learn from their mistakes.
18. Love to give people freedom rather than resorting to control or manipulation.
19. Are neither conflict avoidant (afraid of conflict) nor conflict instigating. Love peace, but are willing to work for it by telling the truth.
20. Do not demand exclusivity in others and are grateful that friends or family members have other relationships.
21. Welcome an opportunity to say they’re sorry.
22. Speak specifically about sin; do not deal in generalities.
23. Offer grace to those who stumble.
24. Love to give rather than hoard.
25. Are self aware.
26. Don’t participate in gossip, but tell the truth in a life giving way.
27. Have a longing to shepherd others.
28. Applaud for others success (not intimidated by others).
29. Let the Holy Spirit convict others (and welcome his conviction in their own lives)
30. Don’t demand trust of others; instead live in a trustworthy manner.
31. Constantly learn.
32. Don’t tie their worth to anything other than Jesus Christ (not position, affiliations, standing, work, finances).
33. Love the Bible.
34. Are known for being gentle.
35. Welcome the opinions of others; don’t surround themselves only with people who applaud them.
36. See accountability in relationship as valuable.
37. Treat their families with love, respect, and humility.
38. Persevere through trials.
39. Seek help when they’re in over their heads, not afraid to ask for help or admit need.
40. Gravitate toward the forgotten, lost, needy, overlooked.
41. Welcome new relationships.
42. Empathize with the pain of others, particularly if they’ve caused it.
43. Have a lifestyle of forgiveness.
44. Choose not to hold grudges or “make them pay.”
45. Are not consumed with social standing.
46. Find joy even when circumstances are not joyful.
47. Are grateful for what they have, rather than coveting what they don’t.
48. Don’t idolize people, churches, ministries, jobs, companies, or systems.
49. Understand the inside out nature of the kingdom, that good words/actions flow from a right heart (works on the heart rather than being consumed with the externals).
50. Boasts in Jesus Christ, not in their accomplishments.
51. Accepts feedback.
52. Have a calmness about them in the midst of stressful situations.
53. Doesn’t immediately default to anger and lashing out.
54. Have a steadfastness in the midst of personal trials
55. Unsurprised by the pain of the world, unalarmed, knowing God is in control.
56. Seeking to find what God is doing even in the most dire situation.

I shared these with my husband, and he was gracious to add a few as well.

What do you think? What are traits of growing, healthy believers?