When someone hurts you, you can’t control what the person will do or say (or whether they’ll threaten or abandon), but you always, always have access to God. Remember, God IS a relationship. He is Father, Son and Spirit in one person. He created humankind because of the beauty and glory of relationship. Who better to come alongside us when our relationships sour than the One who perfected relationship in Himself?
This throne we approach is a throne of grace, not condemnation. If you’re particularly hurt by a condescending person, you can run to the One who understands and offers affectionate grace. You have complete access to God, and you have the power to pray at any moment, even quietly under your breath during an argument. Here are some of the prayers I’ve prayed when I’ve experienced betrayal:
Jesus, help me listen better and not react with a mean spirit. Keep me from retaliating in kind.
Jesus, I need to know You see me in the midst of this conflict. Am I going crazy?
Jesus, I choose to forgive again. Empower me.
Jesus, show me whether I should pull away or pursue reconciliation right now.
Jesus, I’m hurting. Can you bring new bits of healing to my heart?
Jesus, I don’t know what to say. Give the words I can say that will bring the most understanding.
Jesus, I’m confused. Bring clarity.
Jesus, help me to see the long view of this.
Jesus, help me to hold my tongue.
Jesus, help me to hear what is being said behind my friend’s emotion.
Praying puts the burden onto God’s capable shoulders. Your heart and mind aren’t meant to carry all that heartache around. I worry that many folks reading this are carrying something God never intended them to carry. Let go. Place your broken relationship in the hands of Jesus. This you CAN control.
…
Mind if I pray for you?
Jesus, I pray for my friend reading this that You would bring peace in a broken relationship today–and if not from both sides, at least from their side.
Help them to forgive for their sake, to be set free from bitterness.
Give them a listening heart and a willingness to own their own actions.
Give them an appropriate apology muscle–not to over-apologize but to rightly acknowledge their own sin, if there is sin.
Would You help them to find joy today, in this moment, reading this prayer, even when a relationship threatens to usurp that joy?
Give them a holy gumption to do the work You have for them, even if heartache stings the background and foreground of their life.
I pray that You would show them how to be a person of the fruits.
May love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, gentleness, faithfulness and self control be the oxygen of their relationships.
We choose right now to give You our grief associated with a broken relationship. We cannot carry the pain any more. We cannot keep living joylessly because the action or inaction of others.
Take the burden, please. Heal our hearts. Heal our hurts. Restore and restory our relationships today, Jesus. We need You.
Amen.