I want to walk with You on the dusty roads of life
Where the grit of myself sands my toes, my heart
I want to see Your eyes bore into my emptiness,
Your gaze lifting me beyond my small ambitions to be liked
I want to hollow a place for me in the crook of Your heart
Only to find myself already grafted there
I want to be Toni Morrison who writes because her daddy loved her
To effuse words because someone loves me, just me
I want to grasp beyond comprehension that You sit me on Your knee
And delight in the space I occupy
I want to steal Your attention just for a second
To see if You’d bend my way, dignifying my neediness
I want to feel so near to Your heart that to stray one second
Feels like torture dripping or an abandoned house
I want to experience the melody You sing over me in the night
When there’s nothing I offer You but the in and out of tired breath
I want to watch You as You were when you walked this earth
Shockingly normal, splendidly ordinary, mysteriously inviting
I want to know I’d follow You even then, even after You told folks
To consume You, to be consumed by You, to stop consuming things
I want to hear Your words to me, really hear them
And understand that I love you means Your sacrifice
I want to taste Your expensive grace in ways I’ve never dared
To actually believe You love me whether I follow my rules or not
I want to walk with You on the dusty roads of life
Where the grit of myself sands my toes, my heart
And You love me
Anyway
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