Those you most judge are often just like you

May 4, 2011Family Uncaged, Find joy today

Piggybacking on yesterday’s post about my hyperactive conscience, I’ve been thinking about how I’ve been Mrs. Harshypants to myself. If I looked around at all the people in my life, I can see one or two who I judge nearly as mercilessly.

And here’s the kicker: each is just like me.

I see traits of weakness that I hate in that other person, things that reflect my own heart. Instead of loving them well, I curl inside myself and judge them. Maybe not on the outside, but inwardly I cringe. I pull away. I don’t engage. Because they remind me of my own shortcomings, failures and sins.

Which is why it’s instructive to me. Perhaps this is the truth: I can gauge how well I’m dethroning Mrs. Harshypants by how well I’m embracing those folks who rub me the wrong way (because they’re so much like me.)


Do a check on your relationships.

  • Who is most like you?
  • Who do you recoil from?
  • Why?
  • What traits do they have that drive you crazy?
  • Are they similar to your bad habits? In what ways can you offer grace to the people in your life who are similar, yet infuriating?
  • Any advice/insight on how to break free?

I look forward to your responses.