I received this great advice from a friend re: circles

Oct 15, 2009Find joy today, Heal from the past

I received this piece of great advice from Karen Rabbitt, author of Trading Fathers. She’s given me permission to post it.

Hi Mary,

Re: nourishing yourself while nourishing others.

First, I applaud the humility that prompts you to ask for advice. That shows a recognition of your own limits. That understanding, of course, is the foundation of staying balanced.

As a psychotherapist for many years, I had to learn to keep boundaries lest I be pulled into my client’s deep pain and struggles. It’s a hard thing to learn, especially when we are in positions where we are admired. Coming from emotional neglect, I love to be admired, so that’s a weak spot for me. I’m guessing you might identify.

A couple of thoughts that have helped me:

1. Know those emotional weak spots. You’ve written about knowing one’s vulnerabilities regarding sexual temptations. Also ask God for understanding about other vulnerabilities. Be very self-aware. Don’t let old/primitive emotional needs be met in unhealthy/sinful ways.

2. An image God gave me once: Both I and my client ride a horse. We ride along together for an hour a week in session, but I don’t get on her horse, nor do I allow her to get on mine. When the time allotted is over, we go our separate ways until the next time. God provides/God is the horse…who will lead her and support her. We entrust our clients/readers/followers to Him.

Bless you,