Difficult Questions – 29

Oct 13, 2014Uncaged Podcast

The Gist:

This week I’m answering 3 of your questions. Here they are:

Here’s a question for you, Mary. It kinda mirrors ‘lisa’s’ question. Throughout my later teens, I was used and betrayed by men, a lot. I searched for love from others and trust in them, only to be hurt time and time again. Once married, even my husband hurt me deeply through betrayal. I find my mind constantly assaulted with negative, suspicious thoughts, something my mother constantly struggled with in regards to my Dad. Before she died, she instilled in me that a man will ALWAYS betray, eventually, as my father certainly did to her. How do I get free of these suspicious thoughts and learn to trust again? Anonymous

Mary did you ever suffer from anxiety? I am having a very difficult time with it. I get very frustrated when anyone mentions being raped. I was and I am trying to get past it. I was at work tonight and someone was watching the news and that’s all i heard about for about 15minutes. I was getting so mad. I don’t know what to do anymore besides trying to use my copeing skills. Healing does not seem to be happening for me. I feel stuck. I pray for help but i can’t get past this phase. I don’t know if you have any answers but if you do can you help me. Thank you. Gloria

I have been in counseling with the same person for the last 1 1/2 years. The basic gist of what happened to me as a child is known, but I haven’t told the story of it in any sort of timeline. It’s all been in pieces. At the beginning I was told that I didn’t have to tell everything right then, that I could take my time and only share what I was comfortable .sharing. How important is it to sit down and tell it from the beginning? Am I just being weird in wanting to tell it in story form instead of in bite sized, out of order bits? If it’s ok to tell it all, then how do I start? How do I tell my counselor I need to tell the whole story? Do I really need to tell the story as a whole? It feels like it, but I don’t quite trust my feelings. A lot of it will be on repeat but put in order. Is this helpful? Will this harm my counselor? (I visibly traumatized another one about 1 1/2 years ago) (Sometimes I think this one gets rattled– I don’t want to hurt him). Shelly

Scriptures:

John 2:24: But Jesus didn’t trust them, because he knew human nature.

Quotes:

“Folks have to prove themselves trustworthy. Trust is earned not automatically granted.” Mary DeMuth

“There is no greater agony than bearing an untold story inside you.” Maya Angelou

Resource:

Necessary Endings by Henry Cloud

The Stages of Grief Click the link to read more about the five stages of grief.

The Power of Story by Jim Loehr

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This podcast is brought to you by:

The Wall Around Your Heart (Jpeg Format)So many of these questions deal with relationships and the pain that can come from them. In The Wall Around Your Heart, I give you a roadmap (the Lord’s Prayer) that will absolutely help you overcome your relationship pain and stress.

 

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