Not Marked

Sexual Abuse and Porn – A Correlation


I’ve been meaning to write this post a long time, but as you can imagine, it’s not exactly the easiest can of worms to open. I’ll start with my own story, a painful one to admit, told stark on the page of my memoir, Thin Places. Early on, my father dulls me to the dangers […]

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Displaced Loyalty and #churchtoo


When I rallied enough gumption to tell my babysitter, a person in authority (at least over me), that teenage boys were raping me, she let me think she would take care of the problem. But the next day the boys took me away to do what they were wont to do to me that kindergarten […]

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Why We Can’t Bury #ChurchToo


We love to live in a world we understand, where children are not preyed upon, where we can trust our leaders. We would rather pretend all is well than confront what is reality. I wish this was the reality: churches as safe places. While that is often true, it’s not always true. (Thankfully, ministries like […]

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Weinstein: One Good Thing


Jogging through my  neighborhood this morning, I spied a bird’s nest in a crepe myrtle only because its leaves were in the process of shedding. It made me think of exposure. I would never have noticed the nest had it not been for the advent of autumn. All that to say, sometimes the leaves have […]

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When Rapists WIN

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I’m watching the Netflix series The Keepers right now, and halfway through, I’m sad. Sad because, wow, sexual abuse has always been a problem, and as long as powerful people get away with it, powerful systems will seek to cover it up, revictimizing victims. It’s sickening. The documentary looks into the killing of a young […]

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The Inconvenience of Victims


My husband sent me this story last week, and I’m now able to respond to it. Trustee Albert L. Lord wrote this about the aftermath of the former Penn State president’s guilty verdict (one charge of child endangerment) in regards to the Sandusky case. “Running out of sympathy for 35 yr old, so-called victims with […]

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Healing from Trauma is like the Bends


I received this email from someone who is reading Not Marked. She is working through healing from past sexual abuse. A counselor is helping her, as is the book and workbook. I’m so proud of her. I’ll call her Molly. Her words were so wise, and her metaphor so apt, I asked her if she’d […]

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Why I wrote Not Marked


I recently received a sweet email from a reader named Lesa. She summarizes so beautifully why I wrote the book Not Marked: Finding Hope and Healing after Sexual Abuse. She writes: Thank you for writing in my opinion one of the most authentic revelations of the personal struggles and journeys of a childhood sexual abuse […]

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Not All Men (thankfully) are like James, Jerry and Pat


Some painful memories are resurfacing this week as I once again attempt to close the book on a very difficult story when I was a little girl. It’s been beautifully excruciating, if that makes any sense. But smack dab in the middle of this God-ordained journey came a man’s lewd comments that left me spinning. […]

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2000 Minutes of Action


Sexual abuse victims: trigger alert. Recently the news was ablaze of the travesty of justice for the Stanford swimmer (Brock Turner) who received a 6-month sentence for a brutal rape of an unconscious girl. She eloquently (and painfully) shared her story in a victim statement. Brock’s father lamented that his life was forever altered because […]

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