Heal from the past

The Sexy Wife I Cannot Be


(I recently found out this post is no longer available on the site I originally wrote it for, so I’m posting it here for the sake of those who need it. This post is the impetus for writing Not Marked: Finding Hope and Healing after Sexual Abuse. And it is birthed in pain and reality, […]

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Your Silence Hurts Others


I’ve had the sad privilege of walking alongside some friends who are battling in some significant relationships. They teeter on the edge of breakup mainly because the other party will not tell an honest story and their painful past has caught up with them. So many of us believe the lie that if we hide […]

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Why Strawberry Ice Cream Makes Me Cry


When I was a little girl, before my father died, he would take me every other weekend. Several memories stand out. We would go to the Wise Penny in the University District and look for thrifty finds. He would let me “shop” in his basement where I “bought” (er, stole!) artifacts from the landlady’s boxes, […]

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Two Words Series #3: My faults


This is the third part of a three-part series about two words. Today’s two words? My faults. Read part one here, and part two here. I have many faults, and I don’t always share them in public like skivvies on a clothesline. But today as a part of being real, and helping us all feel […]

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Have you ever just wanted to be okay?


With permission, I’m sharing a letter I received that is so powerful, revealing the angst of healing from the past. I love her words, and I know you will resonate. Have you ever just wanted to be okay? … I read Thin Places, and many of the details are my same story: growing up in […]

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When God Doesn’t Seem Good


I’m reading through old posts, and I came across this one based on a letter I received from a reader. It’s heartbreaking, and I wish I could jump through the screen to hug this girl Amy. I did the best I could by writing her back. But even then, the question lingers. Is God good? […]

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Why God’s First Words Can Change Your Life


Genesis 1:3 records the first words (that we know) God spoke. And God said, “Let there be light,” and there was light. Four amazing words. Let there be light. God loves light. He created it as the first thing. The light scattered and shattered the darkness. It revealed what was and what would be. In […]

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What If?


The six-year-old awakes, cloudy-eyed and confused. Someone is touching her. Her mommy told her that no one should ever touch her in those places, the places her bathing suit covers. As soon as her eyes flutter open, the babysitter flusters away, and she is left feeling shame. But she has no words to say why […]

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When we protect perpetrators, we pervert the gospel


Prayer appreciated again. Heart is heavy. And yet I refuse to capitulate. I will shout it: sexual abuse is soul-killing and the church has for far too long kept it hushed, re-victimizing victims and protecting perpetrators under the guise of cheap grace, while simultaneously chucking grace when it comes to the victims whose lives will […]

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God sends us to hard places


I’ve often quoted Genesis 50:20 when I talk about being healed from the past. “As for you, you meant evil against me, but God meant it for good, to bring it about that many people should be kept alive as they are today.” The gist? Joseph, who was sold into slavery by his brothers, is […]

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