Why not just be wronged?

34 Comments 06 September 2010

I remember the conversation well. I shared why I’d brought up the issue, but she continued to defend herself, blaming others for her actions. The Lord reminded me of a verse in that moment. “Why not rather be wronged? Why not rather be cheated?’ (1 Corinthians 6:7) But she didn’t like that verse.

I don’t much like it either. It’s hard to be wronged. It’s hard to allow someone their run of your heart. It’s excessively hard to be silent when wronged or cheated. It seems the right thing to do to tell the truth so others know. And yet, sometimes God commends our ability to let wrong happen. To us. To those we love.

Of course, there are times to be loud about it.

And then there are times God calls us to the discipline of being wronged. In those moments, I learn (slowly) to rest my reputation and my pain in the great big arms of Jesus. To let God get a word in edgewise. To trust Him for outcomes instead of me running around micromanaging the world, doling out judgments and punishments I deem proper.

I can honestly say there is joy when you lay your pain down and give up your right to defend. There’s peace there.

I love this:

Commit everything you do to the Lord.
Trust him, and he will help you.
He will make your innocence radiate like the dawn,
and the justice of your cause will shine like the noonday sun.

(Psalm 37:5-6, NLT).

God sees. He sees your innocence. He will bring it to light. Trust Him today for that. Rest in being wronged, knowing you have an Advocate. Nothing passes His notice.

Be Sociable, Share!

Related posts:

Be Sociable, Share!

« Called to write? 10 Ways to know.

A Sonnet about God Seeing Me (hint: He sees you too) »

http://www.marydemuth.com marydemuth

What a great heart you have, Trudy! Amazing.
http://www.marydemuth.com marydemuth

What a great heart you have, Trudy! Amazing.
http://twitter.com/GEMSMinistry @GEMSMinistry

Mary, love this post! It reminds me of Jesus in Isaiah 53. He was beaten, stricken, smitten, and afflicted. Yet He was SILENT! He did not cling to His rights as God. So often I want to cling to my rights. But God has taught me to love like Jesus does, to lay down my rights and my life to follow Him. It's tough stuff to walk this Christian journey. But I know we'll reap of harvest of righteousness if we don't grow weary in doing good!

http://www.marydemuth.com marydemuth

That's so true. It's hard not to grow weary, but so important.

http://twitter.com/GEMSMinistry @GEMSMinistry

Mary, love this post! It reminds me of Jesus in Isaiah 53. He was beaten, stricken, smitten, and afflicted. Yet He was SILENT! He did not cling to His rights as God. So often I want to cling to my rights. But God has taught me to love like Jesus does, to lay down my rights and my life to follow Him. It's tough stuff to walk this Christian journey. But I know we'll reap of harvest of righteousness if we don't grow weary in doing good!

http://www.marydemuth.com marydemuth

That's so true. It's hard not to grow weary, but so important.

jerigodsdreamsforme

This is so needed. I just prayed about an issue and He's answered through this post and key verses. I've been silent in obedience
jerigodsdreamsforme

This is so needed. I just prayed about an issue and He's answered through this post and key verses. I've been silent in obedience
http://www.marydemuth.com marydemuth

So glad this post helped.
http://www.marydemuth.com marydemuth

So glad this post helped.
LauraLeeShaw

Love this post! I was just thinking about this verse last week when I heard it on a radio program. We are so easily offended, and I am the worst. Thanks for being another voice of Truth talking straight to me.

http://www.marydemuth.com marydemuth

Thanks LauraLee.

LauraLeeShaw

Love this post! I was just thinking about this verse last week when I heard it on a radio program. We are so easily offended, and I am the worst. Thanks for being another voice of Truth talking straight to me.

http://www.marydemuth.com marydemuth

Thanks LauraLee.

http://mydogrio.info Karen Peavler

Wow, Mary. Bringing this topic up is very brave of you. We live in a society that elevates the strong and powerful, and believes in defending their "rights". Anything less is a sign of weakness, and no one will advocate being a "doormat." Thank you for standing up for the "peculiar" ways of the Lord, who is our example. It is so hard to live like Jesus lived, but that is what He has called us to. And that is usually 180 degrees away from what is natural, and what the world would tell us to do. But, we are not to be "of the world".

http://www.marydemuth.com marydemuth

Very good point, Karen. It is so hard to turn the other cheek or keep our mouths shut!

http://mydogrio.info Karen Peavler

Wow, Mary. Bringing this topic up is very brave of you. We live in a society that elevates the strong and powerful, and believes in defending their "rights". Anything less is a sign of weakness, and no one will advocate being a "doormat." Thank you for standing up for the "peculiar" ways of the Lord, who is our example. It is so hard to live like Jesus lived, but that is what He has called us to. And that is usually 180 degrees away from what is natural, and what the world would tell us to do. But, we are not to be "of the world".

http://www.marydemuth.com marydemuth

Very good point, Karen. It is so hard to turn the other cheek or keep our mouths shut!

http://www.crystalizedreflections.blogspot.com Crystal

WOW! God has definitely spoken to me through your words. I just happen to be going through something right now, thinking "It's just not FAIR!" Even when I saw the title, at first I didn't want to read it because I knew God was going to show me I was wrong, and of course I didn't want to be wrong- since I already felt I was being wronged!! Thank you so much for sharing this!

http://www.marydemuth.com marydemuth

Crystal, I'm humbled that this post helped you. Wow. So cool.

http://www.crystalizedreflections.blogspot.com Crystal

WOW! God has definitely spoken to me through your words. I just happen to be going through something right now, thinking "It's just not FAIR!" Even when I saw the title, at first I didn't want to read it because I knew God was going to show me I was wrong, and of course I didn't want to be wrong- since I already felt I was being wronged!! Thank you so much for sharing this!

http://www.marydemuth.com marydemuth

Crystal, I'm humbled that this post helped you. Wow. So cool.

Dianne

How do you know the difference between being wronged and being walked over and a toxic friendship?

http://www.marydemuth.com marydemuth

I think the difference is degree. It's one thing to overlook an offense and move on. It's another when someone continually violates your boundaries, says awful things, and re-offends often. In that case, it's best to let go of the friendship so you can forgive and heal and move on.

Dianne

How do you know the difference between being wronged and being walked over and a toxic friendship?

http://www.marydemuth.com marydemuth

I think the difference is degree. It's one thing to overlook an offense and move on. It's another when someone continually violates your boundaries, says awful things, and re-offends often. In that case, it's best to let go of the friendship so you can forgive and heal and move on.

Tina

Mary, Thank you for this blog. Your words "Rest in being wronged, knowing you have an advocate". Your words keep ringing in my ears. Definitely the Lord speaking through you! I just need to let the Lord deal with and take care of the untruths and serve him in the ways he wants me to. Who am I to judge others when I am not perfect myself? I just have to concentrate on what I'm doing and how I'm living. It's not easy but it's what I need to do. Leave it in God's hands.

In Christ's Love and prayers – Sis in Christ , Tina

http://www.marydemuth.com marydemuth

Glad to hear it helped, Tina. It's hard to rest in our Advocate!

Tina

Mary, Thank you for this blog. Your words "Rest in being wronged, knowing you have an advocate". Your words keep ringing in my ears. Definitely the Lord speaking through you! I just need to let the Lord deal with and take care of the untruths and serve him in the ways he wants me to. Who am I to judge others when I am not perfect myself? I just have to concentrate on what I'm doing and how I'm living. It's not easy but it's what I need to do. Leave it in God's hands.

In Christ's Love and prayers – Sis in Christ , Tina

http://www.marydemuth.com marydemuth

Glad to hear it helped, Tina. It's hard to rest in our Advocate!

http://www.jezamama.blogspot.com Jessica

He is my defender. Thank you for the reminder. I started out holding to this, but somewhere in the twisting of losing friends and being wronged…I lost sight of releasing and allowing Him to do what He needs to do.
http://www.jezamama.blogspot.com Jessica

He is my defender. Thank you for the reminder. I started out holding to this, but somewhere in the twisting of losing friends and being wronged…I lost sight of releasing and allowing Him to do what He needs to do.
http://livingpower.blogspot.com Laurie Wallin

Well, I'm so glad I found you through Emily Freeman! This is my biggest daily battle as a mom of children adopted from foster care. They behave in ways nobody understands, say things that make friends at church's mouths drop, and tantrum at ages years past what anyone thinks is normal. And there I am, presiding over it. Not tolerating, mind you – there are consequences for misbehavior. But there, next to it. The mother of the 8 year old screaming insults and smashing groceries in a store parking lot. Whose heart is broken beyond what any onlooker can imagine, but they don't know that. They just know what they see. And I feel wronged by that every day. Embarrassed. Humiliated. I wish I could defend myself, but I know it isn't necessary or helpful. So I sit, and just be wronged. Finding more of Jesus's grace every time I let myself fully be with those moments….
http://livingpower.blogspot.com Laurie Wallin

Well, I'm so glad I found you through Emily Freeman! This is my biggest daily battle as a mom of children adopted from foster care. They behave in ways nobody understands, say things that make friends at church's mouths drop, and tantrum at ages years past what anyone thinks is normal. And there I am, presiding over it. Not tolerating, mind you – there are consequences for misbehavior. But there, next to it. The mother of the 8 year old screaming insults and smashing groceries in a store parking lot. Whose heart is broken beyond what any onlooker can imagine, but they don't know that. They just know what they see. And I feel wronged by that every day. Embarrassed. Humiliated. I wish I could defend myself, but I know it isn't necessary or helpful. So I sit, and just be wronged. Finding more of Jesus's grace every time I let myself fully be with those moments….